I’ve backed off the blog this week because it’s honestly been stressing me out.
I’m the type of person who wants something and wants it now. That’s probably one of the reasons I’ve always struggled with long-term goals. I get excited about the destination and forget that most worthwhile things take time.
I created this blog as a way to hold myself accountable for the changes I’m trying to make in my life.
And they are good changes.
I’ve been sober for almost 8 months. I’ve lost about 35 pounds. I’ve gotten stronger. I eat better than I used to. I’m taking better care of myself than I have in years.
Am I where I want to be? Not even close.
But I’m definitely not where I started.
The problem is that I start looking around at other blogs. I see people with thousands of followers, huge audiences, professional-looking websites, and tons of engagement. I want that too.
Then I spend time writing a post, putting my thoughts out there, sharing it on social media, trying to market it, and I check the numbers.
Five views.
Ten views.
Maybe a handful of likes.
And if I’m being honest, that can be pretty discouraging.
It starts to feel like you’re putting in a lot of work and talking to an empty room.
That’s when I realized something.
The blog was never supposed to be the goal.
The changes in my life were the goal.
The blog was supposed to be a record of the journey.
Somewhere along the way, I started measuring success by views, followers, and traffic instead of by the things that actually matter.
Am I healthier?
Am I stronger?
Am I making better choices?
Am I becoming the person I want to be?
Those are the numbers I should be paying attention to.
So I’m not looking at that anymore.
I’m just going to keep doing what I’m doing.
I’m going to keep posting. I’m going to keep sharing my posts. I’m going to keep doing the marketing. Most importantly, I’m going to have patience with it.
The truth is, every worthwhile thing I’ve accomplished has taken time.
I didn’t quit drinking overnight. It’ll be 8 months sober soon.
I didn’t lose 35 pounds in a week.
I didn’t get stronger after a couple workouts.
All of those things happened because I kept showing up, even when I didn’t see results right away.
Maybe the blog is the same way.
Maybe it takes a year.
Maybe it takes five years.
Honestly, I don’t know.
What I do know is that if I quit, it definitely won’t happen.
So I’m going to keep writing about my journey. I’m going to keep sharing what’s working, what’s not working, and what life looks like as a regular guy trying to get healthier and build a better life at 49.
The goal isn’t to go viral.
The goal is to keep moving forward.
If I stay consistent long enough, I think the results will come.
And if nothing else, I’ll have a record of a journey that has already changed my life for the better.